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Little cadeaux
Z-Bear loves leaving little ‘presents’ in my purse and I find them the next day when I am at work. Usually they are things like half eaten grapes, sticky cereal pieces, and bunny crackers. But sometimes I find a true gem like this one:
Roses and sugar cookies
So should I make this the gazillionth post on the interwebs today about how I really don’t care about Valentine’s Day? Because I really don’t. Honest. But still, it’s nice to come home and get a sweet rose from Lil Z-Bear and a vanilla buttercream iced heart-shaped sugar cookie from Papa Bear.
Day made. I am really very easy to please.
P.S. I was curious to see what I had posted last year on V-day. Here it is: On Valentine’s Day
On Running (and Weekend Round-up)
Lil Z-Bear and the Jelly Fish
I officially took up running when I started college. I was a painfully shy young adult who had arrived not too long ago to this country. I would take the bus to school every day and I had a couple of hours to kill between classes so I stashed a pair of sweats and my running shoes in my locker and one day I worked up the courage to actually put them on and went running on the track. I used to be so self-conscious about everything that I did then, and I would often feel embarrassed while running at a much slower pace while other runners, who were mostly athletes, would whiz by me. But as I continued running, I became more confident and I realized that people started recognizing me in class as ‘that girl who ran on the track. A couple of guys in my class who probably didn’t even know who I was as I sat very quietly in my corner while furiously scribbling notes, started coming up to me and asking questions about class and homework since they’d seen me running and nodded at me while we passed each other on the track’. I felt like running allowed me to come out of my shell a little and I felt more self-assured. I’d like to say that I kept it up since then, but I have fallen off the running wagon for some time now. This year I want to get back into it, so to jump start it, I did a 5K this past weekend in Philadelphia along with my sister and a friend as running buddies. I had only trained for it for about 4 weeks, and I had to walk part of it, but I was glad I did it because I am really pumped about continuing to run and ramping up to longer distances.
When the run started on a snowy Saturday morning, I was nervous because I knew I was woefully out of shape and I wistfully remembered the days in college when a 3.1 mile run was actually a warm-up before I started my workout. Still, there was something about the Rocky music playing as we made our way to the starting line with the Art Museum as a backdrop that took care of the nerves and got the adrenaline rushing. And when I reached the end tired and out of breath, I had a sweet little toddler waiting for me at the finish line with Papa Bear, both with a huge smile and a big hug for me. My younger sister who had already finished the race before me came out to meet me and we dashed the last hundred yards to cross the finish line together for a photo finish.
Photo finish with my sister
After the race we went to Sabrina’s Cafe for a delicious brunch. I couldn’t help but laugh at the fact that my sister and friend talked about going home and taking naps while I knew that as soon as we were done, we still had a whole day ahead of us, including doing groceries, preparing dinner, feeding and taking care of Lil Z-Bear and doing laundry. On Sunday we got to sleep in a little and didn’t wake up until 6:30 am. Hah! I love that 6:30 a.m. is actually sleeping in for us because we are usually up before 6 every morning, weekend or no weekend. I made pancakes with vegan sausage and bacon (that stuff is actually pretty good, or maybe it’s just because I don’t know what the real stuff tastes like!) My favorite part about Sundays is having the time for a big breakfast and this is my absolute favorite, no-fail pancake recipe. After breakfast, we finished some housework, put Lil Z down for an earlier nap, and around 12:30 in the afternoon we left to meet up with family at the New Jersey Adventure Aquarium. Last week Google deals was running a great special of an annual membership for just $99. I meant to mention it here on the blog to for those who are local, but it slipped my mind.
Petting the sharks
Lil Z loved the aquarium; it’s so enjoyable to re-visit places as a parent, because there’s nothing quite like watching the look of wonder in a toddler’s eyes as a shark or sting ray swims by. This was Lil Z’s second time at the aquarium, but he really appreciated it more now. Since we now have memberships to both the NJ Aquarium and Philadelphia Zoo, we anticipate a lot more visits to both places in the upcoming months!
Hippos were a BIG hit with Lil Z!
Filed under: Random
Why pay up to $1.00 for a Hershey Bar Chocolate when you can have a Valrhona Chocolate bar (both milk and dark!) for 99 cents at Trader Joe’s!
Also, I sometimes overlook just how convenient it is to have a Trader Joe’s, Wegmans, and Whole Foods all less than 3 miles from our home!
Playing defense
Some days being a parent to a toddler is a lot harder than others. The other night we were caught in the blur of our weekday evening routine: I was cooking while Lil Z-Bear was eating his dinner. Only, he wasn’t sitting on the highchair feeding morsels of food into his mouth while watching me chop vegetables like he usually does. He was running around the kitchen singing, playing with the food that I had put on his plate and placed on a chair, and rubbing blueberries in his hair. Papa Bear came home and walked into this scene of placid domesticity (hah!) and I gave him a mollified look and told him to take Lil Z upstairs and start getting his bath ready. I quickly covered the rice with foil to steam, the heady scent of basmati filling the kitchen, and rushed upstairs. What followed was a battle of wills as two adults just barely managed to wrestle a determined toddler into taking a bath and getting dressed. We came downstairs to give Lil Z some warmed milk and usually that’s the time we dim the lights, cuddle, brush his teeth, and wind down for the night. But this night Lil Z was bouncing off the walls. He grabbed some crackers from the kitchen and proceeded to crumble them and rub them into the carpet. He jumped off the couches and tables (he’s quite the acrobat!) and he just did not want to calm down. And he definitely did not want to do the night time routine yet because he didn’t want to go to bed. So 20 minutes of cajoling, tears, and screams later, we finally put him to bed and shuffled down the stairs completely exhausted. I began putting our dinner on the plates when Papa Bear gave me a tired smile and thanked me for keeping it together just then since he felt ready to lose it.
There are some moments in parenting that are breathtaking, and I know that I will remember the moment no matter how old Lil Z gets. But more often, parenting is a lot about playing defense. About dodging what the little one throws our way (literally and figuratively). And at each step, we take turns where one parent keeps it together while the other one is allowed to unravel under the pressure. We’ve figured that as long as we don’t both lose it at the same time, we’ll be fine.
The best things in life are Chocolate
It’s been a busy week and the blog’s been a low priority.
This weekend we had a long list of to do’s. Saturday we started chipping away at our tasks and managed to get the groceries and a haircut for Lil Z-Bear off the list when we ended up doing an impromptu visit to the Philadelphia Zoo in the afternoon and spending the rest of the day with family.
So today was supposed to be a catch-up day with errands…instead we’ve done little except hang out in our pj’s and make homemade chocolate pudding…
Lazy Sundays are the best.
We’ve come a long way, baby!
There are instances where I can’t get over how much this little guy has grown.
My bad
No, he didn't eat the whole thing!
Papa Bear is a great dad and he’s been amazing at taking care of Lil Z-Bear. Plus, he never balks at changing a poopy diaper. And he never once played with dolls as a boy. Back story on this one: A few months back I read a post by a mom who said that she bought both her boys dolls to play with so that they will be good dads when they grow up. I was taken aback by this, not because I think boys shouldn’t play with dolls, but because of the assumption that nurturing an inanimate object in early childhood will have a positive effect on your parenting skills as an adult. I never played with dolls as a kid, and so far, I’ve managed to keep Lil Z alive and well, despite my ‘lack of training’. I feel that sometimes there is so much emphasis placed on gender neutral toys that we forget that kids are just kids any they will play with whatever they want to play with. Sorry, I digress here, returning to the post, I was saying that Lil Z has an awesome dad. Still, it so happened that yesterday I was finishing up cleaning the kitchen/making dinner and it was bath time for Lil Z. I looked at the time and asked Papa Bear if he wanted to bath Lil Z since I wasn’t done in the kitchen yet. He looked at me panicked, and said that he’d just wait until I was done. And then it hit me, Lil Z is 19 months old and the number of times that my husband has bathed him is zero. Zero. Now I could get huffy and complain that Papa Bear has never bathed Lil Z, but the thing is, it is entirely my fault.
My name is Sadia and I am a control freak. Exponentially so since becoming a mom. The reason is simple: I have mommy guilt. Now I don’t care that there are celebrity moms out there saying that working moms say they feel guilty but they really don’t. And even though I do agree with other working moms who share their experiences through blogging who admit that they love working and enjoy the ability to make a contribution, that still doesn’t take away my mommy guilt. It’s still there, it exists, and it probably always will, so I’ve just accepted it and moved on. But I realize that in trying to assuage some of my mom guilt I’ve taken over almost all things that involve Lil Z-Bear’s care when I am at home to make up for the time I am not.
I cannot help but wonder if part of this is due to cultural background. I’ve witnessed it over and over: in Southeast Asian culture, if a guy helps around the house and helps with the kid chores, he is considered going above and beyond. Yet women who work and take care of their families are not always given their well-deserved accolades simply because it is expected that they are supposed to do all these things. I’m not trying to do any cultural bashing here; there are many pluses in the cultural norms too: there can be tons of family support and less isolation, lot of encouragement to breastfeed, lots of holistic ways to heal common ailments, lot of attachment parenting etc. I’m just saying that I need to let Papa Bear bath Lil Z once in a while. It’s either that, or learn not to snap at hubby whenever he blanches at the suggestion he prepare Lil Z’s lunch.
The best 40 bucks I ever spent
Buying stuff for Lil Z-Bear can be a gamble. We may end up using an item until it falls apart, or it may sit and collect dust until I put it in the ‘to donate’ pile. One item that was almost an impulse buy at a little baby boutique has become by far the most used baby item in our house:
Aden + Anais Muslin cloths. I am talking of the real deal, the boutique line that costs $40+ and not the Target version (which I have noticed are smaller and thinner than their higher-priced counterpart.) Why do I love them? Well, we got them when Lil Z was just a month old, and we used them to swaddle him in the warmer months. It was perfect because the lightweight fabric worked much better than the thicker SwaddleMe we used later on. And it was the perfect summer blanket for a tiny baby on a warm days. Also, it’s the perfect changing pad (we hardly every used the changing pad that came with the diaper bag). And it’s the perfect nursing cover, due to the soft and pliable muslin fabric. The box comes with a generous 4 blankets, and I have washed them over and over and over again, and they always come out looking like new. Not a single thread has snagged, even though Lil Z walks around pulling on them all over the house. They are still his favorite thing, his perfect security blanket (so I’m glad we have 4!) Lil Z never cared much for a pacifier, but these blankets have been his comfort item because he holds on to it and rubs his face with it when he falls asleep. It is even the perfect teething item because Lil Z would ball up a corner and chew away. And still, not a snag in the fabric.
Aden + Anais – the best $40 bucks I’ve ever spent!